Birthday shoutout!!!

There lots of birthday shoutout for last month. So lets follow the order.

Firstly, my beloved boyfriend...my beloved brother. Well im sorry for the late wish. Birthday ko 23 but I wish on 24. But at least I wish. Hehehe. So..like I said. Happy belated birthday. You are truly my brother. You already 25 while im still 24. So wish first...i wish you to have happy and loved live forever. Be happy with didi....walaupn aq xberapa suka didi but at least she make you happy. That more than enough. Aq xleh cakap jangan dating..sbb aq thu bile tgh bercinta mmg otak xcentre sgt. But at least igt agama bila berdating tu yer...use protection.tettt. Ok...Keje rajin2...kumpul duit banyak2. Kawin cepat2. And always be healthy...ko kne ske g gym...so keep your body fit and eat well ok. I love you more than didi...hehehe.

Secondly, my beloved dongsaeng...my baby...my bird...my got7. Jackson...happy belated bday. You always smile and make joke. That enough to fill up this noona boring days. But I wish you to at least share your pain with someone so that it does not bottled up in you. Be healthy always...its important to entertain ahgase but its more important to love yourself first. Thanks for being happy and teach something that others cant teach me. Keep being you..who knows how many people will you inspired. Love yah. Im proud ahgase. And congrate on all of our award...ahgase will work hard..i will try to help..but being international fan..that so little we can do. Im sorry.

Lastly, my beloved dongsaeng...my enemy...my blood. Munirah Aisyah Binti Alias. I love you to the moon and back. Walaupun menyakitkan hati lg byk dr menyenangkan hati...but at least i have a girl in my family. Walaupun mulut xreti cover...at least i know you are stupid that way. Hadiah??? Nanti lah..bile along ada duit lebih. Tp kalau nak handset harap maap lah. Tuan punye diri pn hanset xtukar2. But seoul garden is a promise to keep. Wish??? Semoga jd bijok and kaya. Leh g korea teman along.

So...that its...few people that worth my breath and my time. Worth my love and my trust. You guys are my strength...so keep being strong and healthy..keep in love.

I LOVE YOU GUYS FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART TO EVERY CELL IN MY BODY.

My problem???

I think i know something about myself. Its weird but I just realized that it is me..its my reaction everytime its happen. Hmm...should fangirling a kpop idol called crush or love?
Either way...i know that the longest time I ever fangirling an idol last for about a year. Then it dissapear like I never knew them. Its good reaction and good attitude actually if you are fangirling an idol. Because no matter how hard you try they will never be yours.
The problem is...even they are not artist or an idol...I still have that crazy hardcore cupid arrow in my heart but then few month after that its gone. But what i realized...when i started to notice that i fell in love with someone...I will keep my distance from him. So the problem is...WHEN WILL I GET MARRIED IF THIS HOW I RESPOND TO MY HEART??!! Hmmmmm.

I wonder how long have I reacted like this. Its not like I have love trauma ( a lie) its not like I have trust issue(another lie)...but I dont think any of that make me react like this. I dont know. Maybe my standard is sooooo high.
Well I have two supporting boyfriend...which I called brother. They not perfect but at least they are there when I am in need. At least they know me for 10 years. They know when im not okay and they give maybe the craziest advice ever but at least they help me for 10 years now. I have two younger brother that cling on me...I maybe not the best sister they ever have. But I think I spoil them to much. They maybe rude everytime...but they are the medicide for my stress..they are the poison when im not in stress..they are the one that I spend my money the most. And most importantly...i have a father that over protective...that always treat me like a child. Maybe that is why im so spoiled and childish. But nothing to complain about that. I love the way I was loved.
But to find someone that can beat all this features...i dont know. I dont think i will ever find the one. Maybe my standard is tooo high. You cant blame me when im surrounded by someone that nearly perfect in my eyes.